f.o.r.g.i.v.e.n

Fiery Tempest

2009-06-27T12:09:00.000-07:00

Wind blowing,

Anointing flowing,

Revolutionary seeking,

Tradition tweaking,

Life-carrying,

Fire-marrying,

Elements merging,

Revival surging,

Holy breathing,

Heat seething,

Passion spreading,

Enemy dreading,

Far ranging,

Ever changing,

No reversing,

No rehearsing,

Nothing standing,

God-branding.

The Spirit's desire-

A Tempest of Fire.

Dear Rebeccah Beushausen..."I Know What It's Like"

2009-06-16T14:27:00.000-07:00

This blog entry is dedicated to Rebeccah Beushausen. I truly have compassion for her. I do not condone what took place, and my heart goes out to all who were hurt and who are still hurting as a result of everything surrounding the "April Rose" blog. However, I felt like the Lord inspired me to write this to heighten an awareness concerning some very real spiritual battles that she may be facing, and to testify that there is hope even in the midst of overwhelming devastation. The hope we have in Christ can genuinely and drastically change the course of our lives and bring us to a real and lasting victory over our past. My hope is that many will rise up in intercession for Beccah, with hearts that are burning with the very compassion and unconditional love of Christ.

I know what it’s like…

to have been taken advantage of,

to have suffered at the hands of my own poor decisions

and to have walked a long, foggy road where those two worlds converged.

But praise God I now also know what it’s like…

to not only know but feel like a new creation in Christ,

to watch in awe as the Lord has restored the years that the enemy tried to eat away

and to live a life characterized by uncompromising faith and victory over the enemy.

I know what it's like…

to have had deep rivers of emotional pain running constantly through my soul,

to have stooped to desperate measures in order to relieve the torment

and to have compromised my faith in God in order to try and ease my suffering.

But praise God I now also know what it’s like…

to live where the peace of God reigns in my heart and in my soul,

to experience inexpressible joy even in the midst of severe trials

and to know, that I know, that I know that the joy of the Lord is my strength.

I know what it's like…

to have battled the fierce and unmerciful demons of addiction,

to have felt like I just simply didn’t have the strength to make the right choices

and to have struggled continuously with things I so desperately wanted to turn away from.

But praise God I now also know what it’s like…

to triumph over the demons of addiction and demolish strongholds in the name of Jesus,

to overcome temptation because I have the Greater One living on the inside of me

and to know that I am more than a conqueror over the power of darkness.

I know what it's like…

to have betrayed the very people who were reaching out to me and trying to help me,

to have recognized that people had very legitimate reasons for not trusting me

and to have come to the realization that I did not even trust myself.

But praise God I now also know what it’s like…

to trust in Lord with all my heart even when I can’t wrap my mind around it,

to watch God miraculously straighten out my crooked paths and order my steps

and to experience healing and restoration in relationships which I thought were beyond repair.

I know what it's like…

to have watched my world slowly unravel the more I tried to keep it together,

to have made excuses and lived in denial for extended periods of time

and to have sincerely questioned my sanity.

But praise God I now also know what it’s like…

to just be still and know that He is God and I am not,

to overcome the intimidation of the spirit of fear

and to walk in the Spirit of power, of love, and of a sound mind.

I know what it’s like…

to have occasionally thought that maybe I had wandered too far from the hand of God,

to have seriously doubted that I would ever be completely, healed, delivered and set free

and to have wondered if anyone would ever take me seriously and believe in me again.

But praise God I now also know what it’s like…

to be overcome with gratitude that the Lord was faithful to bind up my broken heart,

to have complete faith in the healing and deliverance power of the Lord

and to want people to take God seriously and believe in Him more than in me.

I know what it's like…

to have felt ridiculous asking for forgiveness for the same thing countless times,

to have felt like I was drowning in a raging sea of guilt, shame and condemnation

and to have felt unworthy of my Heavenly Father's love.

But praise God I now also know what it’s like…

to not only know I am forgiven but to feel like I’m forgiven in the depths of my heart,

to feel like I’m drowning in the sea of God’s mercy, love and grace

and to have a revelation of the Father’s love that has nothing to do with my worthiness.

I know what it's like…

to have felt like a horrible witness for Christ and also a downright stumbling block,

to have questioned my salvation because of my weaknesses and my failures

and to have felt certain that God would never be able to use me for His Kingdom purposes.

But praise God I now also know what it’s like…

to be excited about the call upon my life and wonder how God is going to use me next,

to see God be glorified through the very things that the enemy meant for my harm

and to know the pleasures of being used by God to help set others free.

I know what it’s like…

to have wondered how it was even possible to mess my life up so badly,

to have continuously beat myself up because I hadn’t forgiven myself

and to have felt like I deserved to suffer forever because I dug my own pit.

But praise God I now also know what it’s like…

to be rescued for good and washed clean from the muddy pit of my past,

to forgive myself and to be able to think about my past sins without falling apart

and to know that, with Christ, my past will definitely not define my future.

I know what it's like…

to have wondered if I would ever see the light at the end of the tunnel,

to have sincerely wished that it would all be over and that I would just die

and to have felt so completely and utterly distant from God.

But praise God I now also know what it’s like…

to realize that I serve the God of the miraculous and that all things are possible with Him,

to walk in a freedom in Christ that I didn’t even know existed

and to enjoy the gift of uninterrupted intimacy with my Heavenly Father.

YES, I know what it’s like!

The Glory

2009-02-06T10:19:00.000-08:00

Is it just me or is it natural for us as human beings, as we look forward to heaven, to find solace in all of the things that won't be there in that perfect place of paradise? The mere absence of things such as frustration, pain, tears, dirt and messiness which requires tidying and cleaning will be a wonderfully glorious thing in and of itself. (Anyone want to take a stab at what I was doing while this thought occurred to me!)

Anyway, I think I know enough about heaven to be sure that none of those, above mentioned, things will be present. But as I thought about what will make heaven so "heavenly," I realized it would be the fact that we would be able to experience God in ALL His glory. Let that sink in for a moment!

The more I learn about His glory, the more excited that makes me! I came to the conclusion that even if there were any of those types of things in heaven, (which there aren't) that there would be NO possible chance we would notice them anyway- God's glory would be too bright and too intense. (Wow, if there's ever a time that you can't find any suitable adjectives in the English language, it's when you are trying to covey heavenly things!)

I said all that to say that if the Holy Spirit is my connection to His glory, I want every bit there is to experience here, while I'm still on earth!!! Bring it on!!!

Desperation

2009-02-04T13:40:00.000-08:00

Desperate times call for desperate measures. I think that is a universal truth. As I was deep in thought today, the Lord dropped the word, "desperation," in my spirit. At some level, we have all experienced desperation.

However, desperation is not always a bad thing. There is a kind of desperation that leads to hope and a kind of desperation that leads to despair, a type that leads to life and a type that leads to death, one that leads to blessings and one that leads to curses.

I will not soon forget a little known truth that I learned from a very wise man, concerning faith and fear. Both are like magnets, but they are polar opposites. Faith attracts things from the Kingdom of God, and Fear attracts things from the Kingdom of Darkness.

With that in mind, I believe the Lord gave me this:

DESPERATION mixed with FEAR will cause YOU

to act in ways you never thought you should.

DESPERATION mixed with FAITH will cause GOD

to act in ways you never thought He would!!!

Grateful

2008-11-26T13:25:00.000-08:00

'Tis the season to be thankful.....and grateful! Actually, as followers of Christ we should continually have a thankful and grateful heart for everything we have in and through Christ. Thank you Lord that I have a relationship with You! Thank You for Your grace, forgiveness and mercy! Thank You for my health and my family and my friends! Thank you for Your joy and Your love, and Your peace- Your provision and Your protection. I am truly bubbling over with gratitude! I love You Lord! You are so good to me!

I love this sound all year 'round, but it seems so appropriate the day before Thanksgiving. It's "Grateful" by Hezekiah Walker

Misunderstood

2008-11-26T08:18:00.000-08:00

Have you ever felt misunderstood? That word surfaced in my spirit this morning during my devotional time and I was led to the story of Hannah in 1 Samuel.

12Now it came about, as she continued praying before the LORD, that Eli was watching her mouth.
13As for Hannah, she was speaking in her heart, only her lips were moving, but her voice was not heard. So Eli thought she was drunk.
14Then Eli said to her, "How long will you make yourself drunk? Put away your wine from you."
15But Hannah replied, "No, my lord, I am a woman oppressed in spirit; I have drunk neither wine nor strong drink, but I have poured out my soul before the LORD.
16"Do not consider your maidservant as a worthless woman, for I have spoken until now out of my great concern and provocation."
17Then Eli answered and said, "Go in peace; and may the God of Israel grant your petition that you have asked of Him."

This small portion of scripture is rich in lessons:

Be careful before you assess a situation prematurely. Especially be careful before you spout off too quickly with criticism and rebuke. Your assessment could be 180 degrees from the truth. We have all been Eli's before. (At least I know I have have.)

Realize that these misunderstandings can happen in seemingly "safe" places (the house of the Lord) and come from seemingly "safe" people (a priest).

A gracious attitude and a respectful, loving response to someone who has misunderstood you can be the very avenue that God uses to answer your prayer. At the very least, "walking in love," with those who misunderstand us and respond harshly to us is imperative in keeping our hearts right before the Lord.

In this scripture, Eli ends up replying favorably to Hannah's God-honoring response, but sometimes in our lives, the story doesn't always play out like that. There are times that the anticipated response from "Eli" is not favorable. In addition, sometimes we aren't even given the opportunity to respond at all. Whatever the case, we must strive to keep our attitudes and our hearts pure, even if we have to endure long seasons of being misunderstood.

Facebook

2008-11-25T10:00:00.000-08:00

I just joined Facebook, and I am pretty excited about it. I have thought about it for a while-either that or Myspace. I heard a couple of my new friends talk about it the other day and it just pushed me over the edge. Realizing that it could potentially be a "time thief," I must continually be mindful of that. However, I am actually really excited. Out of raw curiosity, I have spent quite a bit of time jumping from page to page of persons whom I haven't talked to or seen in ages.

Already, I have reconnected with a couple of people who knew me B.C. (before Christ) :) I guess they will be the first of many people who are in for the shock of their lives if they happen to stumble across my profile page. Yes, I am a Jesus FREAK and proud of it! Ha ha! You'd be laughing too if you knew me back then!

Ever Had That Feeling?

2008-11-19T09:42:00.000-08:00

http://resources.bravenet.com/audio_clips/disco_dance/rockwell_-_somebodys_watching_me/listen/

Anybody ever wonder if God has a sense of humor? I don't- I already came to that conclusion early on in my walk with Him. :) Those who have ears let them hear.

Faith or Fear?

2008-11-17T16:12:00.000-08:00

Faith attracts things from the Kingdom of God. I think that a simple look at the life and ministry of Jesus practically illustrates this principle perfectly. I believe this is a spiritual law, because faith attracts things like peace, joy, healing, hope, contentment and salvation.

In contrast, I believe that this principle flipped on it's head holds true as well. The opposite of faith is fear and the opposite of the Kingdom of God is the Kingdom of Darkness. Fear does, in fact, attract things from the Kingdom of Darkness. Think about it; fear is basically a magnet for things like confusion, sorrow, frustration, despair and destruction.

Your thoughts, your words, and even your countenance may be evidence of what Kingdom you are attracting to your immediate surroundings. A careful examination of them may best enable you to answer this all important question: Are you walking in faith or in fear?

Freedom

2008-11-17T13:09:00.000-08:00

It kind of seems that lately my blog has predominantly served as a platform for endorsing my favorite worship music! Oh well- praise the Lord & rock on while you praise Him! This one is called Freedom performed by Eddie James.

Deeper

2008-10-07T11:11:00.000-07:00

I wanted to share one of my new favorite songs. It's called "Deeper," and it is sung by Nicole Binion. I love the words to this song! It just draws me closer, every time I listen to it.

I recently had the privilege of seeing one my dear sisters in Christ, Kenyatta, minister to this song. She does miming, which is where she ministers to the song by using sign language. That's the best way I can describe it. You really have to see it in order to appreciate the anointing she has and the beauty of her gift.

I'm It!

2008-09-29T09:48:00.000-07:00

OK, I'm it. I've actually enjoyed reading everyone else's, so hopefully mine will serve as some sort of entertainment, as well! Here they are- 7 things about me that are random or weird:

I love green olives. I can eat a whole jar (even a big one) in one sitting.

I had my heart set on being a physician until I was in high school. I think I realized after watching ER and Trauma: Life in the ER that I would never get through medical school or my residency because I require too much sleep and my body and (brain) could never function properly with such erratic sleeping schedules. That's pretty sad, the deterrent was not the blood and guts, it was the lack of sleep! I would still love to perform surgery.

Although, I have never counted, because I lost track a long time ago, I have moved well over 30 times in the last ten years alone.

I have an "artsy" creative side to me and I would consider interior design to be one of my passions, although I have never had ample time or finances to really do much with it.

I used to be a perfectionist, and still have some tendencies. (This may surprise anyone who may have seen my house or my car lately.) However, I realized a while ago, especially as children kept getting added into the equation, that I had a choice to make: perfectionism or my sanity, and after some consideration :) I reluctantly chose my sanity

I am a fierce competitor and I hate to lose. I especially love games which involve shooting or throwing an object at a target (basketball, corn hole, etc.)

My love for the Lord and my desire to know Him more intimately is such a tremendously powerful fire raging internally, in the depths of my soul, that I feel like I might explode sometimes! I am totally unashamedly consumed with chasing after Him!

Glory's Well

2008-09-03T06:02:00.000-07:00

The Promised Gift fell
From Glory's well.
The new wine-
Who can define?
Simply ask and receive,
But who can perceive-
The "secret" open-invitation?-
A cleansing saturation
Swimming in Heaven's pool-
A refreshing fiery cool.
Inexpressible clarity,
An abundant rarity,
Drunkenness unashamed,
Submission untamed,
Empowering surrender,
The "tearing-down mender,"
Getting lost in discovery,
From the thief- recovery,
Fears arrested,
Faith manifested,
Laughter with weeping,
Healings in heapings,
Loosing and binding,
Losing everything in finding
Sealed-up revelation,
Divine transformation
Defying intellectual reason
In this latter-rain season.
Victory and power
In heaven's shower.
Miracles abound
When His Presence falls down.

"My Life, My Love, My All"

2008-09-02T10:33:00.000-07:00

I love the gospel music of Kirk Franklin, and this may be one of my favorites. I just wanted to share this video. The song is called "My Life, My Love, My All." The simplistic beauty of the lyrics can easily bring me to tears. Enjoy.

Jalen's Poor Wrist

2008-08-19T11:07:00.000-07:00

As you can see, Jalen broke his arm this Sunday. He actually broke it in three places. Yes, it was pretty severe, and yes, he continues to be in a lot of pain almost 48 hours after the fact, but praise the Lord, it didn't require surgery. The doctors just had to put him to sleep to set the most severe fracture in his wrist back into place.

He was quite a trooper, considering that we were at the hospital from about 5:00 pm Sunday until about 4:00 am Monday morning. He's going to be fine, but please pray for a speedy recovery, because he is a VERY active boy and once the initial pain subsides, he will have to contend with abstaining from most physical activities for quite a while. I think that will be the most difficult part of it for him.

I Love Me Better Than That!

2008-06-16T12:12:00.000-07:00

I Love Me Better Than That

I heard this song for the first time a couple of months ago and it struck me to the very core of my soul. One of my favorite lines says, "I know I made my mistakes, but it's never too late!" Thank you Jesus, my Savior, my Rescuer and my Redeemer! Yes, Jesus is many things to me, but I know Him very intimately in those ways. He not only saved, rescued and redeemed me from eternal damnation, but He also saved, rescued and redeemed me from what seemed like a life of hell here on earth.

I really didn't know what to make of the title of this song (loving yourself) at first, because initially it seemed a little selfish/ self-centered until I listened to it in the context of the whole song. There is one line which says, "It's impossible to love somebody else when you don't even love yourself." Hello!!! Loving others and loving God is pretty important in our Christian walk! I know, first hand, truly how difficult, if not impossible, it is to love others & God when you don't love yourself. I have many years of experience in not loving myself, others or God, and believe me I don't ever want to go there again!

We must love ourselves in order to fulfil our destinies in Christ. Above all, we must learn to view ourselves like God views us, because it is only then that we can begin to grow in genuine intimacy with our Heavenly Father, and that is our highest calling as His children. We truly are precious in His sight! From intimate fellowship with Him will flow a desire to cherish, protect, and cultivate our God-given gifts and talents so that we may optimize them for His service in order to build up the Body and bring lost souls into the Kingdom.

Potty-Training

2008-04-30T09:48:00.001-07:00

I just had to share something hilarious. We have been trying to potty-train Christian, who just turned 2 in March, for about a month or so now. During this "training stage," his interest and success can fluctuate from high to almost non-existent in a matter of a couple days.

There are days where he is obsessed with sitting on "the pot", and it seems he rarely wants to even leave the bathroom. On the contrary, Christian has had just as many days were I know that he needs to go. On these occasions, he will vehemently resist any attempts at getting him close to "the pot," then, only moments later, I find he has just done his business.

Anyway, I guess today Christian was in a different kind of mood. He decided to "change his own diaper." I was sitting at the computer desk when, out of the corner of my eye, he walked into the living room, took off his pull-up, went to the side of the couch (where I keep the bag of fresh pull-ups), took out a new pull-up and proceeded to put it on (backwards). Then, without paying a bit of attention to me, he walked right back upstairs to resume his activity.

I sat there kind of surprised, but much more amused than anything, and just took in the moment. I walked over to the abandoned pull-up which was not only wet but warm as well. What had transpired was certainly cute, but as I reflected on what I had just witnessed, it left me with more questions than answers, one of which was: why would he go through all of the trouble to come downstairs and change his own pants when he obviously thought it was too much trouble to stop what he was doing in the first place?

Babies are so funny, but I know I wouldn't have been so amused if there was a "#2" involved! Toddlers are so much more intelligent than we sometimes give them credit for. I personally think that any toddler who is capable of changing their own diaper is certainly capable of being potty-trained while they are awake!

The Peace of God

2008-04-17T08:00:00.000-07:00

As many of you know my sister, Rebecca, is just beginning her journey as a Christ-follower. As I disciple her (what a tremendous honor!), I have been trying to convey some basic spiritual truths to her as simply as possible without "overloading" her. I point out whenever possible, how the Holy Spirit is working in her life, and have encouraged her to become aware of His presence.

We were talking last night, and she told me such an encouraging story of something that happened to her Tuesday. I don't think she would mind me sharing this. Her husband just started working 3rd shift, and it has been a difficult adjustment for her to be alone in an empty house at night. While she was laying in bed feeling lonely and a little fearful (she lives kind of back in a remote and wooded area), she began to pray and cry. ( She told me she cries a lot while she is praying.)

Her prayer was something like this, "God I know that you are with me, and I know you are keeping me safe. I know you can get these thoughts and this fear out of my head." She told me she tried to envision herself peacefully sleeping in the palms of His hands. All of the sudden Rebecca heard two beeps, which she thought may be a household appliance. Her attention was diverted from her prayer as she began to wonder what had made that noise that she didn't quite recognize. Then what she described as a calm came over her, and rested upon her. I am quite sure that this calm she experienced was the "peace" that Paul was referring to in his letter to the Philippians:

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

God is so awesome! What is the lesson to be learned?....especially for those of us who have been following Christ a little bit longer! He WILL manifest himself in our situations if we will come to Him with such SIMPLE faith, boldness, and expectancy and He WILL meet us right where we are if we just acknowledge Him FROM OUR HEARTS.

I could almost guarantee you right now that not only would Rebecca be unable to recite that scripture, but she's probably never read it or even heard it, but now that she has experienced God in that area, that scripture will become much more than just a memory verse to her!

One last thing, I wanted to share which was just precious. As I was getting off the phone with her, I told her that Chad was preaching on the Holy Spirit this weekend, and it was going to be some really good stuff. Rebecca then said, "Oh yeah, I've got that now! I'll be there!" The that which she was referring to was, of course, the Holy Spirit. I just smiled , and confirmed to her that she most certainly did have Holy Spirit now. God is so awesome!

John Bevere

2008-04-15T08:32:00.000-07:00

Those closest to me know how much I love John Bevere's ministry. God has used his books and his teaching to impact the lives of many throughout the world for the glory of His kingdom. His anointed words and deep insights reflect his own intimate personal walk with the Lord, and his intense, no-nonsense teachings have been instrumental in my personal growth as a Christian.

Chad and I went to Atlanta to see John Bevere speak this past weekend, and it was a phenomenal experience. Apparently, Chad was planning to surprise me with a weekend getaway for just the two of us, but I ruined it! He had to come clean because I approached him (while he was in the process of cementing the plans and reservations) and asked him if we could look on John's speaking schedule and find the nearest city where he would be speaking so we could go.

Wasn't it just the sweetest and most thoughtful thing a husband could have done! He's really good like that!!! We definitely enjoyed getting away for a few days from our busy, and crazy lives as we know it on a daily basis :). The peaceful quality time together was wonderful, but it thrilled me to know that Chad enjoyed John Bevere and the whole atmosphere and worship experience at the hosting church as much as I did.

Here is John Bevere on youtube. I believe his ministry, Messenger International, has a television show overseas, and this may have come from that. Anyway, I'd just like to share it, because he is a truly anointed man of God, and I know it will bless whomever it touches. These are all continuous, so watch them in order. Enjoy and be blessed!

The Spirit of THE LORD is Upon American Idol!

2008-04-12T07:39:00.000-07:00

Last week I was made aware of the fact that Oprah Winfrey was being seduced (by the forces the evil one) into being the ringleader of this mass New Age movement via the media. I think this FALSE RELIGION even led millions of participants in a mass trance my means of the Internet.

However, this morning I learned that the final contestants on American Idol performed "Shout to the Lord" this week. How awesome is that!!! I believe with all my heart that both of these events were just the results of the spiritual battle going on in the heavenly realms. Satan struck a vicious blow via the media and God was having none of that!

Mark 10:27 says that ,..."all things are possible with God", even praising the Lord through song on a secular TV program! Take that Satan!!! You go God! Keep praying, saints, that glimmers of the light of God can continue to shine in the media to bring His Truth to a very lost world of people stumbling in the dark.

Easter Pictures

2008-04-06T17:35:00.000-07:00

I was finally able to upload the pictures of Mom, Becca and myself from Easter! I love them so much! What a memorable day! God is so awesome!

Spiritual Spring Cleaning

2008-04-01T18:20:00.001-07:00

In James 1:27 we learn that "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world."

Watching that video yesterday reminded me, once again, how very important it is, especially in the times in which we live, to be firmly grounded in the Truth. I don't really watch TV much anymore for that reason. I am convinced that there is not much "Truth" on TV.

I believe our spirits are like sponges, and, as Christians, the Bible teaches us to keep ourselves from being polluted by the world. I have noticed that since I have cut many things out of my "diet," the Word of God and biblical teachings can much more easily penetrate and resonate with my Spirit. In other words, I have eliminated a lot of the competition (or pollution) from my spiritual diet, and the results have been life-changing.

I certainly am not being legalistic and saying that no one should watch TV or anything, because I don't think absolutley everything on TV is awful. I am just sharing a spiritual truth which has been life-changing for me. I am not anti-media either. Christians need to be aware of things going on in the world around them. I do enjoy reading news stories on the Internet and I spend a fair amount of time researching topics of interest and answers to questions online as well. I do realize I have to be careful on the Internet, but I kind of feel like I am being proactive in that regard as opposed to just "vegging" out in front of the boob tube and allowing trash (whether obvious or not so obvious) to seep into my soul.

I have made two rather interesting observations:

I once read that a person begins to crave the very things they feed themselves. It is interesting to note that ever since I began to read and study the Word more than I watched TV, my appetite for TV almost disappeared completely. Honestly, I don't really ever think about watching TV......but I'll tell you what does dominate my thoughts- practical spiritual applications to the real life situations I continually encounter.
As I continually strive to keep my spirit from being polluted, when I do unintentionally encounter things which I know are offensive to God, I am hyper-sensitive to them and almost repulsed. Almost without exception, I am taken back to a time in my life and reminded that the very things that now cause the little hairs on the back of my neck to stand up, at one time, could have gone virtually unnoticed, been totally ignored, been rationalized and deemed acceptable and maybe even celebrated (OUCH!).

I invite Followers of Christ to heighten your awareness of what may be competing with biblical Truth in your life. Don't be deceived into thinking that you can allow pollutants to infiltrate your spirit without consequence. Contrary to what Oprah may think, when it comes to His relationship with you, God is, indeed, a jealous God! God does not like it when we allow filth and dirt to compete with His Pure, Refreshing & Transforming Truth in our spirits.

So ask yourself this question: If my spirit were a sponge, which one would it resemble most?

Saturate Your mind with Truth! Now there's a simple formula for Spiritual Spring Cleaning!

The Spirit of the Antichrist is Upon Oprah!

2008-04-01T05:54:00.000-07:00

Sorry all of you Oprah fans, but this video speaks for itself. A friend of mine just sent this to me, and although it surely doesn't surprise me, it still is amazingly disturbing to watch Oprah and hear these words roll off of her tongue. I guess the most disturbing part of it to me is not only does she have such a vast sphere of influence with millions of unsuspecting people in her viewing audience, but she is also backing a presidential candidate. I could go on and on with a commentary on this video but I think what really came to mind after I saw this was the following passage of scripture from 1John (below the video). Watch it and let me know what you think.

I think this passage of scripture from 1 John 18-27 says it all:

Dear children, this is the last hour; and as you have heard that the antichrist is coming, even now many antichrists have come. This is how we know it is the last hour. They went out from us, but they did not really belong to us. For if they had belonged to us, they would have remained with us; but their going showed that none of them belonged to us.

But you have an anointing from the Holy One, and all of you know the truth. I do not write to you because you do not know the truth, but because you do know it and because no lie comes from the truth. Who is the liar? It is the man who denies that Jesus is the Christ. Such a man is the antichrist—he denies the Father and the Son. No one who denies the Son has the Father; whoever acknowledges the Son has the Father also.

See that what you have heard from the beginning remains in you. If it does, you also will remain in the Son and in the Father. And this is what he promised us—even eternal life.

I am writing these things to you about those who are trying to lead you astray. As for you, the anointing you received from him remains in you, and you do not need anyone to teach you. But as his anointing teaches you about all things and as that anointing is real, not counterfeit—just as it has taught you, remain in him.

I am not saying that Oprah is THE Antichrist, but I do believe there are spirits of the antichrist at work in the world today. When most people think of the Occult, they think of Satan worshipping, animal and human sacrifice, black magic, etc. To most people, those practices are obviously dark and evil, but as I am realizing, especially after I read up a little more on the topic on wikipedia, that the occult encompasses so much more than what I originally thought- namely New Age practices.

But it should come as no surprise as we consider 2 Corinthians 11:14, "And no wonder, for Satan himself masquerades as an angel of light." Basically, the vast majority of those who are deceived will be deceived with something that seems like light. Could it be that this deceptive light that Satan masquerades in is in fact the New Age Spirituality? In this, everyone is invited to create their own image of God and worship that. Just to state the obvious- worshiping something that man creates, whether it is a golden calf or a "new idea of God" is idolatry. Not good! Not good at all!

Do You Know Your Name?

2008-03-25T11:01:00.000-07:00

This man was extraordinary. Richard Wurmbrand was born March 24, 1909 and died February 17, 2001. He was a Romanian evangelical Christian minister, author, and educator who spent a total of fourteen years imprisoned in Romania. He is also the founder of the Voice of the Martyrs. I read about him for a while today before I even came across this video that I am sharing. I don't care to write explicit details concerning the various tortures he endured and witnessed during his time in captivity, but if you are curious, it is not that difficult to find on the WEB. He is an inspiration to all who claim the name of Christ.

Watch this video and see if it doesn't put you in your place! Sometimes it's good to be put in your place. Most Christians I know, including myself, can so EASILY forget what it's really about as we live as spoiled, whiny Americans- so easily offended and so easily distracted from hearing that still small Voice- even on our best days. Do you really have much to be upset or depressed about?!? Do your problems still seem so big?!? I know I needed this. It is still so easy to fall into the enemy's trap of thinking that it's all about us- and it's not!

My question to you is, "What is Your Name?"

Happy Birthday, Rebecca!

2008-03-25T10:07:00.000-07:00

This post is a little late coming, because I was waiting to upload a picture from our camera. It seems that, at least for now, the software on our computer doesn't want to cooperate, so I will just have to describe the picture for you.

It was taken this past Sunday afternoon, and it is beautiful picture of my mom, my sister Rebecca, and myself together in the baptismal pool at GCC. We are are all smiles, all huddled together, and they are good and drenched! Rebecca finally took the leap and put her faith in Jesus during the 11:00 service at GCC on Easter. I had the honor of baptising her later that afternoon, after our families enjoyed a delicious meal at Huber's. (I also baptised my mom. She has been a believer as far back as she can remember, but she grew up in the Catholic Church and had only been "sprinkled" as a baby.) What an honor- as I know that my mom had a whole lot to do with praying me into the Kingdom!

In that very moment that we were all changing back into our our dry clothes, I flashed back to an evening sometime last month where I vividly remember sitting with Rebecca in my living room reading and teaching her the story of Jesus and Nicodemus from the Gospel of John. It prompted me to turn to her and say, "Happy Birthday!" She looked a little confused, but I reminded her that now she was officially reborn. We both smiled.

What a wonderful way to celebrate Easter! Please keep Rebecca in your prayers as she begins her new life in Christ!

Amazing Grace- "Hillsong" Remix

2008-03-11T09:13:00.000-07:00

Probably my all time favorite praise and worship album is United We Stand by Hillsong United. I have listened to it countless, countless, countless times, and I can't imagine ever getting tired of it. Hillsong is a church in Australia, and the only thing I can say is that their music is anointed! This video came from their annual conference last year which was held in Sydney. It caught my eye because it was entitled Amazing Grace, and we are about to wrap up our series on Grace- at GCC. All I can say is, I wish I was able to sit in that auditorium in person. Who knows- maybe some day!!!

(By the way- the first 6 minutes is mostly instrumental and the 2nd 6 minutes has vocals- just in case you don't have time to listen to it all. Although I would highly recommend the whole thing, because I think the instrumentals kind of usher in the presence of God!!!) Hopefully you can somehow position yourself to have your very own worship experience while you watch this! Enjoy!

Connect the Dots

2008-01-17T09:28:00.000-08:00

It says in Proverbs 9:9-11, "The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding."

I read this morning in Proverbs 17:10, "A rebuke goes deeper into one who has understanding than a hundred blows into a fool."

Isaiah 33:6 says, "He will be the sure foundation for your times, a rich store of salvation and wisdom and knowledge; the fear of the LORD is the key to this treasure."

(All of these scriptures are taken from the NASB, by the way)

I guess what I got out of these three verses after "connecting the dots" is this:

Fear of the Lord LEADS to Understanding God's ways
Understanding God's ways LEADS to Tenderness Toward Convictions
Tenderness Toward Convictions LEADS to Adherence to Rebukes
Adherence to Rebukes LEADS to Obedience
Obedience LEADS to Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth LEADS to Intimacy with Jesus (a rich store of salvation)

I don't know about anyone else, but my ultimate goal is to become more intimate in my relationship with Jesus so learning about the fear of the Lord excites me! My prayer is that everyone at GCC will make this connection as we continue to explore this topic. If the fear of the Lord is really as foundational as it seems to be, is it any wonder why so many people find themselves hindered in their relationship (or lack of relationship) with the Lord.

I don't believe it's because they don't have good intentions. I simply think many lack this fear out of ignorance, which hinders their understanding of the deep things of God. You know what the old saying, "the road to Hell is paved with good intentions." I believe God is a rewarder of our good works- not our good intentions. (That's a whole different topic that I'll save for another time.)

Our Crazy Family!

2007-12-23T19:29:00.000-08:00

I stole this idea from some other blogs, but isn't it hilarious! Ironically, it pretty accurately depicts life around our house! Loud, silly, crazy, and chaotic! By the way, the reason that I am not shown in the video is because "my character," had locked herself in the bathroom to read & enjoy some peace and quiet! Just kidding- it would only allow 5 "characters." Enjoy!

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Christmas Lights

2007-12-18T10:44:00.000-08:00

It's been a while since my last post. I have to admit that my lack of posts lately have not been because I have been busier than usual with the Holidays. I just haven't had much laid on my heart to share.

We haven't done a whole lot of decorating this year for a couple of reasons.

1. We have to keep our house as uncluttered and appealing as possible for any showings. (Keep in mind that it's not like the square footage of our current house makes it easy to have a spacious, uncluttered "feel" with a family of six living in it in the first place.)

2. Even if it weren't for the possible showings, trying to find the decorations in our garage might prove to be challenging, if not impossible. (Chad's house in Falmouth was quite a bit larger than our house in Louisville, and we practically moved the majority of the contents of Chad's whole house into the garage.)

We do have a small tree, though. I guess it just makes us appreciate others' decorations even more. That being said, my sister sent the link to this video, and I thought it was incredible. Enjoy!

God's "Presence" = My Birthday "Presents"

2007-11-23T07:45:00.000-08:00

I have enjoyed a wonderful Thanksgiving and birthday week. The "celebration" kind of all started Tuesday evening and will actually continue through tomorrow. Tuesday evening I enjoyed a quiet dinner with Chad at Huber's (without the kids ), and Wednesday I invited myself :) over to Denise's house to hang out with her all day. I might add that I only had Christian with me all day; Jalen and Emrie were hanging out at the Kane's house, and Kayla was with Jordan. My fellowship with Denise was oh-so peaceful, enjoyable and quite edifying! She also served these premium MONSTER burgers for lunch. I bet they were every bit of 1/2 lb.- even after they had been cooked! What a treat!

Thursday, we had "the main meal" at my Dad's. Everything was deeeelicious! Then we moved along to my aunt's to visit with my mom and her side of the family. Tonight, we will be heading to Northern Ky to visit with Chad's family. This week has already been such a blessing- a TRUE Thanksgiving celebration, full of "happy birthdays," cards, cakes, gifts, good food, and time with all kinds of loved ones! I am so very grateful to God and thankful for all he has given me, especially my family and my new friends.

All of that was extravagant, but I would have to say that my favorite present was the one that I believe God gave me. Let me tell you what happened. I received a birthday card from Janet, the person who led me to the Lord, which meant a GREAT deal to me. Although I think of her constantly, we hardly ever get together or talk these days. I had been thinking about her a lot lately and admittedly had been a little sad as I wondered if she thought about me much anymore. So when I got the card I was elated.

In it she wrote, "The scripture that came to me for you is Galatians 6:9 don't lose heart, you will reap." After I read that I was trying to think about how it applied to my life, and if you know Janet, you know that when a scripture comes to her, it it undoubtedly from God. Janet is soooo in touch with the Spirit. I long to grow into that type of relationship with Jesus- extremely genuine and intense and intimate.

That brings me to the next part, the "coincidence," I use that term loosely, because you may or may not already know that I don't believe in coincidences with God. I knew that even if that scripture didn't mean much to me at that moment, it wouldn't be too long before it would. Sure enough, that same evening, I opened up the book I had just started reading by John Bevere, called The Bait of Satan. I love John Bevere, and consider him one the most insightful preachers and teachers that I know. (Drawing Near is a must read.) Right there in front of me was his explanation of Galatians 6:8-9, in the context of his book. How awesome is that! Although it's tempting, unpacking the content of that scripture warrants a whole separate blog entry.

I know what I see in Janet and her extremely intimate relationship with the Lord, and interestingly enough, I feel like John Bevere has a similar closeness with God, which I believe is so evident in his writing. Those are definitely two persons with whom I would love to just spend hours picking their brains about their spiritual walks and their spiritual disciplines. I really want what they have!!! Wasn't it cool that God has known that, and had merged these two people together under the umbrella of one scripture so that I would know it was from Him. I sat on the couch, book in hand, while my spirit leaped for joy! I know the "handy-work" of God is all over the place, but I just love it when he slaps you upside the head with his unmistakable presence.

Then, the next day, to put the icing on the cake, my mom called me to let me know she had one last gift to give me....but that she had lost it. I told her, "Thanks anyway, it was the thought that counted- by the way what was it?" She ended up telling me that it was a T-shirt that said something about "God" and "Coincidences." Pretty Cool, huh! I certainly thought so! I sure hope she finds it, so I can remember my Birthday "Presence" from God every time I wear it!

Misery Loves Company- Satan Wants You!

2007-11-20T05:42:00.000-08:00

One of my new friends sent this to me. Is it true or what- especially the part where misery loves company! Sometimes I have wondered if Satan was so deceived when he rebelled against God in Heaven that he actually thought he could win???? I guess so, I don't know of any other logical explanation.

I also heard that the reason that Satan and his demons are so bent on deceiving the souls of humans and leading them to hell is because we are made in God's image. They hate God, and I guess they realize that that is the best way to get back at God- to try and destroy the eternal fate of as many human beings as possible. People are the pinnacle of His creation, the very creatures whom He loves so much that He would send His very own son, Jesus, to die for- simply so He can have eternal relationships with them.

And it's not like God doesn't have control over everything. In His infinite wisdom, God decided to use Satan and the demons as his pawns (in my humble opinion) to find out who is worthy to receive eternal rewards with their Maker in Heaven. God just wants to see which persons are going to stand up and recognize the Truth and reciprocate His extravagant love for them.

Any thoughts on the subject? Please comment :)

My Tender "Blenders"

2007-11-19T08:42:00.000-08:00

There are many challenges that come with "blending" two families, but I would have to say that after a little less than 6 months, our children are faring well with one another. Kayla's a little older, and is not into "playing" with the younger three very often, but she certainly shows her love for the family in other very practical ways like helping out around the house (laundry, tidying up, baths, fixing food, changing diapers). She really lightens my load on a regular basis.

Emrie and Jalen are both outgoing and energetic and pretty close in age (2 years apart). They are really starting to form a genuine bond as brother and sister. It warms my heart when I witness them having a good time together. Although they have their fair share of arguments, I think they really enjoy each other's companionship. All three of them really love their little brother, Christian. Usually "our little Georgie" is just along for the ride, and Kayla, Jalen and Emrie are all warm and accommodating when it comes to him. I thought I would post a few pics to show off my little "tender blenders." I can't help it, I'm a proud momma who just loves her babies!

Jalen and Emrie wanted to run through the sprinkler so badly that changing into their bathing suits probably seemed like a waste of time. It was probably their last time before the weather got too cold, so I thought it might as well be memorable!

Here they are again standing on the air mattress in our living room. Sometimes I let them blow it up and "bounce" around on it like its a trampoline. In this pic, they were preparing to do simultaneous flips. It's a big treat for them, and Christian loves it too.

Here's my girl, Kayla! How appropriate! If I was Santa, she would certainly be Santa's Little Helper- actually Santa's BIG Helper! I love her willingness to always pitch in, most of the time without even being asked. She's going to make a wonderful housekeeper some day- she's a natural!

This was taken this morning. You can't see it, but they are sharing some candy. Emrie was rewarded after she successfully completed her math assignment and she happily shared with Christian.

Baby Got Book!

2007-11-15T18:52:00.000-08:00

How many of you remember Sir Mix Alot's hit "Baby Got Back?" I am ashamed to say that I do. It was back in the era of my "un-saved" days, so I don't know how funny this video will be to those of you who have never heard of it. Anyway, praise God for a pastor who is willing to think outside of the box and turn something that Satan used for evil to promote The Word Of God. Chad went to school with this guy at KCU. How cool is that! Maybe we can talk Chad into doing something like that to a 50 Cent song or something! Just kidding honey!

Save Me From Myself

2007-11-12T14:48:00.000-08:00

I just finished this book. It's called Save Me From Myself. It's the story of Brian "Head" Welch, the ex-guitarist from the band Korn. I know he looks a little scary, but you should hear how God rescued him from the deep dark pit he was trapped in! Although he and I didn't fight all of the same "demons," I could relate to his story on so many different levels! It is an awesome testimony to the transforming power of God.

Check out these interviews with christianmusictoday.com. and with beliefnet.com

Stairway to Heaven

2007-11-12T05:13:00.000-08:00

Every morning I attempt to begin my day by reading daily awakenings, a daily devotional by Stephen Hill. I love his boldness, and his no-nonsense preaching style. I am finding myself more and more hungry for the things of God. The more I experience, the more I want to experience! It's like a never-ending hunger! I thought I would share the devotion for today, because it's awesome!

The Next Level

But as it is written, Eye hath not seen,nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him.

CORINTHIANS 2:9

Many Christians are living far below God's intended plan for their lives. I want to encourage you today by saying that there is more of God than what you have. There is more of His power, presence, anointing, wisdom, grace and healing virtue. We could learn a lesson from the great inventors. Aren't you thankful that Thomas Edison wasn't satisfied with candlelight? He knew there must have been something better. He was also tired of shouting, which resulted in the invention of the telephone. Henry Ford was tired of riding in a horse-drawn buggy. He moved to the next level by building an automobile.

Allow me to list a few spiritual levels we can get stuck on:

Many spend their lives living on the level of sinfulness. They never seem to break away from their carnal, fleshly desires. They're stuck. If only they could move to the next level.

Many others are satisfied with the level of salvation. They've stepped from the level of sinfulness to being saved, but are not growing in God.

They must move to the level of saturation; that is being continually filled with His Spirit.

After saturation, we will begin living on God's desired level- the supernatural.

My friend, keep on. There's more to God than what you have.

I love it! There is so much to experience of God, even on earth. How badly do I want to reach a new level? How badly do you want to reach a new level? There is always more to strive for, and I am pretty sure that it gets sweeter and sweeter, the higher we climb! What are you willing to do to take it to another level!?!?!?!!!!!!!!!

Prayer Request

2007-11-09T16:52:00.000-08:00

I know that most of you reading my blog are faithful readers of Chad's blog too, so this isn't any new info. We are trying to sell two houses.

Good news! After what seemed like an eternity, we finally got an offer on the house in Falmouth! We countered, they countered, and we accepted! Please pray that everything goes super smooth from now until the closing. I've worked in the mortgage business and I know that just a little snag can kill the whole deal. We have been waiting for so long, and we don't want to count our chicken's before they hatch. Please just pray for us, because we are soooo ready to get one step closer to moving across the river!

Debt Free

2007-11-09T10:07:00.000-08:00

OK, another disclaimer ***I am not an expert in the field of bankruptcy law*** Now, that we have that cleared up, I'll share an analogy with you!

I want to compare and contrast filing Chapter 7 Bankruptcy and Jesus's death on the Cross.

Before the laws became a lot stricter in 2005, I witnessed people get in way over their heads, incurring huge debts, buying houses and cars they could never afford, maxing out credit cards on unnecessary luxuries, and living the high life. Pretty soon the party came to an end. Creditors were calling constantly, bill collectors were knocking at the door. Someone had to pay for the debts, the overindulgence, the irresponsible behavior. But who? The money was already spent. The houses and cars and clothes had already been used and even flaunted and abused. The creditors could repossess some things, but that wasn't enough to foot the bill. The individuals who incurred the debts knew deep down from the beginning that they couldn't afford such a lifestyle. So what did they do- they filed Chapter 7 Bankruptcy. Essentially, the debt was forgiven, without much consequence.

Does that sound familiar to you? Jesus paid the price for all of our debts, as our living sacrifice, by taking it to the cross. Just like Chapter 7 bankruptcy (before 2005), it doesn't really make much sense. It seems too good to be true. But the ways of Jesus are far more awesome than filing bankruptcy. Bankruptcy may forgive you of your debts, but it leaves a mark on your credit. God's forgiveness says he will wipe our slates clean. It says in Jeremiah 31:34, ..."For I will forgive their wickedness and will remember their sins no more." It also says in Psalms 103:12, ...as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.

Another note. It is not so easy to file Chapter 7 Bankruptcy anymore, because laws were passed to protect creditors from the types of abuse that I just described. Someday, there may not be the option to file bankruptcy. We live in a country were the government is willing to "cover our rears" a lot. Some people in other countries don't have that option. As I thought about that a couple of scriptures came to mind. Isaiah 55:6 says, Seek the LORD while he may be found; call on him while he is near. Genesis 6:3 states, Then the LORD said, "My Spirit will not contend with man forever, for he is mortal...".

The Bad News:
We are sinners, and it is our sins that keep us from ever being good enough to get to heaven when we die and enjoy eternal life in the presence of God.

The Great News:
Jesus paid the price for our sins, and if we put our faith in Him and follow Him, we are forgiven, and assured of our place in heaven!

Jesus cut up all of my "credit cards"!!!!

YES!!! YES!!! YES!!! I"M DEBT FREEEEEEEEE!!! (I stole that from Dave Ramsey!)

Christian's "Bath"

2007-11-08T17:40:00.000-08:00

I know I am a little biased, but is he not the cutest thing you've ever seen! Christian insisted on feeding himself tonight at dinner. Usually, it's not such a problem, but tonight we had cheesy chicken chowder (a thick soup). It was a new recipe and, it turned out to be a hit with the whole family!

He made a huge mess!- the kind only an independent-minded 20 month-old can manage. I decided to strip him down in the kitchen sink and spray him off right there. I think he thoroughly enjoyed his kitchen "spa" experience. Look how handsome he looks wrapped in the kitchen towel. He was even gracious enough to pose for the camera with the vegetable sprayer!

Lukewarm!

2007-11-08T08:33:00.000-08:00

"I know your deeds, that you are neither hot or cold. I wish you were either one or the other. So because you are lukewarm- neither hot nor cold- I am about to spit you out of my mouth."

Revelation 3:15-16.

Again, let me present my disclaimer, I am not a Bible Scholar :) I just want to share my heart on a passage which, on more than one occasion, has not only convicted me in a major way, but also put some some holy fear in me. (Not the kind of fear involving worry and anxiety, but the good kind- the holy, reverential fear of God.)

In this passage, John is speaking to the Church in Laodicia, which seems to be missing the mark spiritually speaking. In the New King James version the verbage is a little more graphic. It says, "so that God will not "vomit" them out of his mouth." That's pretty harsh, but how many of you guys know that when the Lord says something you better stop and listen and examine yourself! It is a warning for repentance, because He loves us. (verse 19)

I was talking to Chad about this passage, and he enlightened me with some pretty cool historical facts concerning the city of Laodicia. Apparently, there were two streams, one hot and one cold, that flowed down from a nearby mountain. The hot stream and the cold stream eventually merged- forming a lukewarm pool of water. Each of the streams with the more extreme temperatures were very useful to the Laodicians. Hot water could be used for bathing and washing, cold water could be used for drinking, etc. However, the lukewarm water couldn't be used for much. Essentially, the lukewarm water was useless.

I believe that passage is saying that unless we are "extreme," for Jesus, we are practically useless. I believe the Bible calls us to be extreme or "on-fire" for Jesus- totally sold out to his cause. We are "on- fire" for Jesus when he has our whole heart, and is in everything we say and do.

Let me explain a little more in depth. First of all, I was thinking that many people may have an inaccurate view of what it means to be "on-fire" for God. Think about- if we use the symbolism of fire, just ask yourself- what are some of the characteristics of fire? Fire spreads, it gives off heat and light, and it's presence is unmistakable. In addition, it has "consuming" properties.

Whereas, I believe that the evidence of the fruits of the spirit are unmistakable in a believer's life, it doesn't necessarily mean that you must be religiously flamboyant and constantly and dramatically verbalizing your beliefs and quoting scripture to everyone within a thousand yard radius. To many non-believers those types of behaviors are turn-offs. There may be a time and a place for that type of enthusiasm, but many expressions of our faith through love (Thanks Joe for the round 2 message last night!) can be done quietly.

I like to think of an on-fire believer as being "consumed." What does it look like for someone to be consumed with Jesus? Well, that's easy- Jesus has control over EVERY aspect of their life. It would be ridiculous to think that a flame could be held to a newspaper and everything but the entertainment section, for example, would catch fire. As obedient followers, growing in our faith, we should eventually submit all areas of our lives over to Jesus and be consumed by His Lordship.

Are you consumed with the things of God? If not what's holding you back? Is there any part of your life that you haven't given to Jesus? Don't allow anything to cause you to get spit out of God's mouth, no matter how small you may think it is! Repent for any areas of complacency in your life and pray that God will give you an "on-fire" attitude!!!

Check this out! I ran across it while trying to find a graphic for this post! It's kind of funny and sobering at the same time. The site is called godsbarf.com.

Don't Conform!

2007-11-07T06:14:00.000-08:00

I am a fan of Dave Ramsey, not quite as big of a fan as Chad, but still a fan. He is known nationwide for his radio talk show, and I think now he even has a TV slot. Maybe you have heard of Financial Peace University and the Total Money Makeover. For those of you who are not very familiar with Dave and his philosophy on money, allow me to explain it to you in a nutshell:

Go to extreme measures to get out of debt, and be wise stewards over your money, because it's not yours anyway- everything we have is God's. Basically, don't be bound by debt, but instead save and invest for yours and your children's future and be cheerful givers in the process.

Anyway, Dave Ramsey was one of the speakers at the Catalyst conference that we attended early in October, and at his booth, he was giving away free T-shirts. It was brown with the words "DON"T CONFORM" splashed across the front, and in smaller print it quotes Romans 12:2 "Don't become so well adjusted to the culture that you fit in without even thinking!" (The translation was from The Message, in case you're wondering) On the back it says, also in small print, "daveramsey.com"

It's basically saying don't conform to what society says about how to handle your money, because in case you haven't realized yet, our society says: spend money you don't have; go into debt and don't worry about it; if you want it- find a way to buy it; don't worry about the future- just live in the moment. For the most part, the vast majority of Americans are very short-sighted when it comes to handling money and more importantly very selfish. How can we give to the work of God like we are called to, if we fall prey to this wordly philosophy. It's impossible.

If you are around GCC, you've probably seen a number of people sporting this t-shirt. I think it's a pretty good-looking t-shirt, and as a matter of fact, it was probably my favorite freebie from the whole conference. I wear it quite frequently, not just because I like the t-shirt but because it has a pretty cool message on it, which I think you can apply to everything- not just money.

Anyway, I had it on yesterday at a doctor's office, and got a couple of comments on it. The first came from the medical assistant who has a teenage daughter and she said, "My daughter would love your shirt!" We had been talking for a while, so I got a pretty good read on her and her daughter and realized immediately that she probably thought I was endorsing more of a "hippie" mentality, and before I offend anyone, let me explain. I just don't want people to think I am a non-conformist who condones things that are ungodly. I am certainly not making a blanket statement by saying "hippies" are ungodly or anything, I just didn't want her to misunderstand my cause.

I gently explained myself and the Dave Ramsey philosophy to her, and she just stared at me blankly. After that, I knew for sure that she had initially misunderstood my cause, and I was glad I took the time to explain myself. Afterward, there was an awkward silence, and I just stood there smiling at someone who was either very confused or totally thought that I was off my rocker for buying into something so weird.

Later, in the same doctor's office, a receptionist commented on my shirt, and immediately my thoughts went to the conversation I had with the medical assistant. After being in that office for so long, I was feeling a little worn down, and didn't feel like explaining myself again in great detail, so I lazily replied "Thanks, it's from Dave Ramsey." I hope I didn't miss a witnessing opportunity.

Ian McCormack Part II

2007-11-06T06:16:00.000-08:00

I realize that the video in my last post is very long, but I still strongly encourage you guys to take a look when you can carve out the time. However, for those that don't have the time, I also got a chance to get on his website after I made the post, which has a condensed written version of his testimony as well as some other videos. (I believe these videos are more recent and are of better quality.) Check it out by clicking here .

The Story of Ian McCormack

2007-11-05T16:59:00.000-08:00

I came across this video. It is the story of a man from New Zealand named Ian McCormack, and his supernatural conversion experience. I realize that, with such extraordinary claims, many will want to discredit him and his experience. However, because of some personal experiences I have had, including my very own conversion experience, I know that God can do some pretty amazing things. Therefore, if it sits well with my spirit and lines up with scripture, I tend to want to give people the benefit of the doubt.

I watched it and listened to everything he said, right down to the very end where he answered questions from the audience, and I have to say I believed his story. It seemed to line up with scripture as I currently understand it, and I thought he made every effort to explain everything that he possibly could according to scripture. Here's my disclaimer- I am not a bible scholar. I know the video is very long, but I think it may bless those who watch it. I encourage you to invest the time, and let me know what you think!

Why f.o.r.g.i.v.e.n.???

2007-10-27T07:16:00.000-07:00

When I finally decided I was going to start "blogging," I sat down at the computer to do so without realizing I had not given any thought to what I would name my blog. I carefully started tossing around some ideas over the next couple days, because I really wanted the title to be meaningful and fully capture who "Jennifer Doerr" is and what she is about. I finally came up with the acronym of f.o.r.g.i.v.e.n., which stands for free of restraints, gaining immeasureable victories while elevating His name (look to the upper right side of this page), and of course "His name" would be none other than the mighty name of Jesus!

I don't want to make it seem like my life was not DRASTICALLY changed the day I accepted Jesus into my heart, because it was. I had allowed Jesus to take my heart of stone and replace it with a heart of flesh (Ezekiel 11:19). My "heart transplant" caused me to think differently, speak differently and act differently. But the fact still remained that I was a new person who still found myself stumbling around, more times than I would like to admit, tripping over the wreckage that I had created in my "former life." I knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that Jesus was more than capable of cleaning up my mess, but at times, that still didn't make it easy.

I was reminded of a sermon that I heard when I was a brand new Christian about Jesus telling Lazarus to take off his grave clothes. The story of Lazarus comes from the 11th chapter of John.

Jesus, once more deeply moved, came to the tomb. It was a cave with a stone laid across the entrance. "Take away the stone," he said.

"But Lord," said Martha, the sister of the dead man, "by this time there is a bad odor, for he has been there for four days."

Then Jesus said, "Did I not tell you that if you believed, you would see the glory of God?"

So they took away the stone. Then Jesus looked up and said, "Father, I thank you that you always hear me, but I say this for benefit of the people standing here, that they believe may that you sent me."

When he had said this, Jesus called out in a loud voice, "Lazarus, come out! The dead man came out, his hands and feet wrapped with strips of linen, and a cloth around his face.

Jesus said to them, "Take off the grave clothes and let him go."

Pay special attention to the very last thing that Jesus says. After He raised Lazarus from the dead, His command was to take off the grave clothes. When we become Christians, we receive new life through Jesus. Our spirits are no longer dead, but alive, just like Lazarus. After we become reborn through the spirit, God never intends for us to stop in our tracks and experience life with Jesus while we are still blinded and bound, but to move forward and "take off the grave clothes," every last bit of them. From what I understand, in the time of Jesus, in preparation for burial, dead bodies were wrapped, and bound in "grave clothes." Symbolically speaking, I believe our grave clothes are our fleshly desires, the very things that drove us and set the course for our lives before we became followers of the truth. Being in "bondage" to anything, most certainly, hinders a believer from embracing a relationship with Jesus to the fullest extent.

Little by little, I allowed the Lord to remove my grave clothes, and now I feel so free! Sometimes I want to shout from the mountaintops, because I am free, free of restraints, or bondage. There was no worse feeling to know that, through Jesus, I had the gift of freedom, yet I was still stumbling, unable to fully take hold of all that I knew God had for me. Most of all, I carried extreme guilt because I knew I was unable to serve Him with all that I was. It is extremely hard, if not impossible to be about Kingdom service with grave clothes covering your eyes and binding your hands and feet.

In further explanation of f.o.r.g.i.v.e.n., now that I am free of restraints, I can wholeheartedly be devoted to serving Him and be about His business in all aspects of my life. When we, as Christians, give it all to Him, and elevate His name through obeying Him and serving Him, it is impossible for us not to gain immeasurable victories for his kingdom.

I know many of you have already seen it, either in person or from another link, but I want to mention the impact that this "skit" that our church performed a few weeks ago had on my heart. I thought it was beautifully done. Everyone involved did a magnificent job. It was so touching to see the portrayal of the battle that I knew Christ won for me to free me from the bondage in which I was entangled. Satan can be so sneaky as he lures us away from Jesus with such dangerous and inevitably empty promises, only to trap us in his snare of hopelessness and fear. But the story never has to end there, because when we call out upon the name of Jesus, he rescues us!

I invite anyone who has not seen the skit to watch it by clicking on the image below. The song is called "Everything" and the artist is Lifehouse. (It's not very long- only a few minutes.) You will be blessed!

Coincidence?...Not with God!

2007-10-24T10:39:00.000-07:00

Have you ever given much thought about occurrences in your life that seem to be merely coincidental? I had not really pondered it much until I became a believer. Then for some reason instances of "coincidence" just started popping up all over the place, which I noticed most especially as I concerned myself, more and more, with the things of God.

The reason it came to mind today lies within what happened during my devotional time early this morning. I have to admit that I tend to skip around in my Bible almost on a daily basis. Usually, when I begin my studies, I have a certain scripture or story of interest that is on my heart, so I just try to find it and go wherever that takes me. I got up this morning and, as usual, headed downstairs to the kitchen- straight for the coffee pot :). I was planning on reading from Mark, but I guess God had other plans, even if it was nothing more than to show me that He is, indeed, the "God of Coincidence."

It just so happened that I noticed that Chad, who was already engulfed in his devotional time, was using my primary Bible, the NIV Study Version (because he left his at work.) No big deal, I went for another favorite, the NIV "One Year" Bible, which has daily scriptures for each day of the year (one passage from the Old Testament, one from the New Testament, one from the Psalms, and one from Proverbs). Because of the way that particular Bible is broken up, out of the standard order, I usually just go to the current day. When I got to the New Testament reading assigned for October 24, amazingly it was 2 Timothy 2:22-3:17.

Was it a coincidence that Chad made a post on his blog on part of that very scripture just yesterday!?! I don't think so. Not only that, but when I looked across the kitchen table with my eyebrows a little raised and told him, apparently the Lord had led him back to that very scripture in my Bible, this morning before I was even awake. (Which, by the way led to great discussion in and of itself of the content of that scripture from 2 Timothy.)

Anyway, there have been dozens, if not hundreds of times, that I have read a scripture or heard a sermon that didn't seem as pertinent to my life or my circumstances until say maybe an hour afterwards :) or even later that day or week. Or what about all of the times that I will be studying a certain passage of scripture in my private devotional time where I have some questions and a short time later, I just so happen to turn on the radio and hear a sermon or discussion on my exact question.

I could probably recall and retell many stories of these "so called" coincidences if I had the time, but I don't. After I learned a little bit about the ways of God, I had to throw away all former beliefs that were, in any way, related to fate, chance, fortune, luck, and coincidence! I just think it is beyond amazing to think about the way our, omniscient (all-knowing), omnipotent (all-powerful) and omnipresent (present everywhere) God carefully orchestrates even the minor details in our lives, especially as we seek Him. I just love it when God shows how BIG He really is!

Thanks Janet!!!

2007-10-22T13:01:00.000-07:00

In light of the topic of Chad's last sermon, I felt this would be the perfect way to start my blog. There's no better way to start my story than to describe the very event that changed my life forever- my conversion experience, one of the greatest relational encounters in my life.

Let me take you back to that day in early April 2000. I was a distraught young woman, entangled in the consequences of a montage of bad decisions brought on by my own ignorance and rebellion. Involved in a not-so-God-honoring relationship, I was already a mother, and 7 months pregnant with my second child. I had long since dropped out of college where I had once followed the path of studying to become an engineer. I had deferred all of my hopes and my dreams into a relationship that was not only going nowhere, but it was sucking all of the life, self-confidence and self-esteem that I once had right out of me. Intense feelings of despair and depression replaced any feelings of happiness or confidence I once had.

My mom was more than familiar and extremely concerned with my downward spiral and would have done anything to help me (and her grandchildren). She encouraged me to go talk to someone we both knew. Her name was Janet, and she had been our next-door neighbor from my childhood home for almost 15 years. After much persistence, my mom convinced me to go see Janet. Honestly, I only went because my mom wouldn't let up on the issue, and although I thought Janet was a nice person, I surely didn't think there was anything she could say to make me feel better about, much less change, my horrible situation. Unbeknownst to me at the time, Janet was a Christian, and I was about to find out the reason behind the kindness, goodness and sheer genuineness that I had witnessed in her life and the life of her family (mostly from a distance) for all of those years.

I reluctantly ended up in Janet's living room, and it didn't take long before I was spilling out my heart to her. She has such a gentle, tender and understanding spirit, and I truly felt like she cared for me in spite of all my mistakes and shortcomings that I confessed to her (talk about being Christ-like!). I felt like I could trust her because she wasn't critical or judgmental at my state of affairs. She just listened patiently and attentively as I talked and cried my eyes out.

After a while, Janet switched gears and the conversation unexpectedly turned from me and my problems to God and the Bible. Right away with the mention of "religious things," my guard went up along with all the little hairs on the back of my neck. I was caught off guard, feeling suspicious and maybe even a little angry, but I thought I should give her the courtesy of listening to whatever she wanted to say, seeing as she had just listened to me so patiently.

I believe one of the very first things she asked me was whether or not I believed the Bible was true. How could I even answer a question like that because I had never studied the Bible before? I mean I had never really sought out in my heart to learn about God and what my purpose here on this Earth really was, or what Jesus had really done for me or, much less, what God really expects from those who call themselves Christians.

Growing up, I had heard plenty of things about God, Jesus and the Bible and had been fed a lot of religion. For instance, I knew I believed in Jesus. I thought I was going to heaven because I had half-heartedly digested a small fraction of the Gospel message, which included the part about believing in Jesus, the part about grace and forgiveness, and the part about a loving God. I certainly didn't realize that I was a sinner in need of a Savior so I definitley had no knowledge or understanding of what it meant to turn away from my sins, and the concept of obeying Him and submitting my life to His will was something I would have never been able to comprehend.

My beliefs were something along these lines- God exists, and there are many roads that lead to Him (like any "good" organized religions or "good" spiritual beliefs), but no one could possibly know much about Him or His nature other than the fact that He's good and He's loving, of course. In addition, the only people that won't go to heaven are child-molesters, ax-murderers, Satan-worshippers, etc. You get the point. It all seemed right. It made sense to me, (like I made the rules or something) I guess since I knew I certainly didn't fall into the "bad people" group, my ticket to heaven was punched, and I didn't need to spend any time or energy pursuing God.

Back to Janet's question of whether or not I believed that the whole Bible was true, I know at that point in my life, I must have fumbled around for an answer that sounded half-way intelligent and politically correct or something (I don't remember my exact response), but the truth was I had no clue because I had neither read the Bible nor studied it for the intent of seeking God in any way whatsoever. The harsh reality that I faced at that moment was that I had invested practically nothing into researching the basis for my beliefs which led to my FALSE assurance of where I would spend eternity. OOPS!

Janet assured me that the entire Bible was true and took me on somewhat of a crash-course through hers, explaining and answering all of my questions with chapter and verse from scripture. At some point, I was sold on the fact that the Bible was true- every last word of it. Then the most incredible thing happened, Janet showed me in the Bible that God loved me (even though I didn't love myself at the time.) It was actually pretty unbelievable to realize that God loved me so much that, not only did He send His son, Jesus, to die for my sins, but I could cast all of my burdens upon Him also. It was amazing. My spiritual blinders were completely removed and my heart was wide open to accept Jesus as my Lord and my Savior.

I wanted everything that God had to offer and was ready and willing to repent of my sins and turn my life over to Him. Janet held my hands and prayed with me and an unexplainable warm current of intense peace, joy and love ran through my hands and down my entire body, and if by any chance I wasn't sure that I had encountered the One and Only Living God before that happened (which by the way I was absolutely certain that I had) then that would have sealed the deal! I wish I could describe that AWESOME feeling. I think it was just an itsy-bitsy glimpse of what heaven will be like, in the presence of God!

I cannot explain how good it felt to know that absolute truth existed at a time in my life when there was so much pain, anxiety and uncertainty. It was such a relief to be able to anchor myself on "the Solid Rock" of Jesus, my Savior, and to know that His answers to all of my questions were true and sufficient and that by trusting in His ways He could sustain all my needs.

That encounter is so dear to my heart! I wish I could remember every last detail of that fateful Spring afternoon from the time I sluggishly waddled (7 months pregnant) with my shoulders hung low and my eyes fixed downward into Janet's living room to the time, many hours later, that I seemingly skipped out of her house with my heart leaping for joy. Janet told me herself that I had a glow, and I knew it was the outward manifestation of the new hope I had in Jesus that was bubbling over in my heart.

That pivotal day I gave my life, along with numerous cares and countless burdens, over to Jesus, and that was the beginning of my new life with Him in the driver's seat. I don't want to leave anyone (who doesn't know any better of course :) ) with the impression that life has been nothing but a smooth, leisurely adventure down a safe country road since April 2000. It hasn't. The "ride" would have and could have been a lot smoother had I not kicked Jesus out of the driver's seat so many times especially at the beginning of our journey together. I guess the longer we, as Christians, travel, the more we realize that we are simply destined to wreck if we insist on being in the driver’s seat even for a moment.

However, praise be to Jesus who meets us right where we are after a "break-down," and only upon our invitation does he lovingly fix the vehicle and take control of the wheel once again, leading us on the straight and narrow path of His will and onward toward our final destination, Heaven!

Thanks to everyone who patiently hung in there with me while I, sometimes stubbornly, allowed Jesus to work the major kinks out of my life. You know who you are!

I found out later that Janet had been praying for my salvation for many years, and I am so very, very, very grateful of her persistence and faithfulness in the Lord. She is still an inspiration in my walk with the Lord to this day, and I can only hope that God allows me to be present when He shows her the ripple effect that that one relational encounter we shared in April 2000 had on His kingdom.